growing things

Originally published March 8, 2012.

It's hard work growing children. In the course of one single day, mamas can experience the heights of joy, the depths of despair, boundless grace, profound temptation.

Roller coaster, yes? Yes.

 There are many ways to "decompress" from the demands of motherhood, without necessarily getting away from the kids.  I like to grow things in the dirt.  As well as in my home, around the table.  I think the dirt itself must release joy, for I am unable to go out in my garden and NOT feel more joy. 

I cannot be outside, weeding, chopping, hoeing, sowing and be unhappy. 

Perhaps it's partly the analogy of growing things and Growing Things that brings me joy.  I plant, I tend, I water, I weed.  
I nurture. 
I protect.  
And the little seedlings respond to my tender care.  As do the Seedlings.  And, occasionally, they don't.  Occasionally, no matter what I do, I can't make them grow, respond, flourish. 

It might be the soil.  It might be the environment. The weather.  With the seedlings, I am so much more willing to relax and know that I am doing all that I can.  But with the Seedlings, the Olive Shoots, the Fruit...I worry so much more when they don't flourish.  Perhaps my joy in the garden comes from the reminder that I am doing all that I can do.  And it isn't always perfect. 

It is so easy to get troubled by the little day to day difficulties, the drooping heads.  But when I step back, and look at the whole thing, the Whole Garden, that which I cultivated, and that which I could not make happen, that which was already there by God's good grace or by the hard work of those who came before me, I see Beauty.  I see His majesty and handiwork.

I see the love and passion that God gave me.  I see truth.

It is all working together for the greater glory of God.