day in the life...the less obvious advantages of being nice

I work with my children one on one in the morning.  Sit down work should be pleasant.  In fact, sitting down with your child should be an opportunity to Do Good.  To Be Nice.

It is unlikely that a lot of education is going to be happening on the days where you can't be nice.  And there are those days when you have not one ounce of nice left in you.

So, when I do sit down work with my children when I'm tired or grumpy or under the weather, sometimes I have to remind myself..."if I'm grumpy, short tempered, snarky right now, this whole dang day is going to go sideways in a big hurry."

Sometimes that's the only thing that will keep me going, knowing that things will just get tougher.

But here's the reality pill.

When we are nice, against our particular feelings in any given moment, we get stronger.  We are practicing virtue.  We are opening ourselves up to grace.  We are not giving in to our natural inclinations, but are relying on supernatural responses.  We are practicing SELF CONTROL.  

And.  When we practice SELF CONTROL we model self control for our offspring.  They can learn how to have self control NOT because we punish them or berate them or send them to their rooms.  The learn it because they SEE self control. 

We all having, lying latent in us, this super power of self control.  And when we use it, we get better at it.   And, more super power coolness.  We don't have to wait until we are angry, tired or frustrated to practice self control.  We can practice it anytime!  With food and spending and social media and talking on the phone and gossiping and swearing and so many things!!  We can just have some self control, not take as much as we would like, not say everything we think, not do everything we would ever like to do.

We get stronger.  Nicer.  We win.  They win.  Win.  Win.  Win.

And that is AWESOME.