the fundamental elements of kindness part three
It's taken me a while to work up to this one.
Because it's hard. Think about it: FORGIVENESS OF INJURIES SUSTAINED
Let's define injuries sustained. You could get injured in a lot of ways. Including, but not limited to:
car accident
stepping on lego
falling on your keister because you slipped in juice (by the way, that's spelled "keister")
tripping on the sidewalk
being punched by someone mean
Sometimes injury is by accident (lego). Sometimes it's intentional (mean person). But more often than physical injuries (well...in my case, physical injury is frequent because I'm klutzy) we experience injury by the way people speak to us. Often, the way they (meaning those who are offending us, children, spouse, co-workers, family members) injure us is by their choice of words, their small criticisms, their complaining when we SERIOUSLY work so hard. It may not be their intent to injure...but it is their choice that injures, and therefore feels intentional. But as mamas we can also get injured by all the little unintentional moments of the day. Where someone leaves their stuff lying around, doesn't appreciate us, needs us constantly.
Injury by what they (the offenders) DON'T do. Anyway, when we are human beings dealing with human beings, we are going to sustain injuries. One way or another.
How many times do we sustain injuries, injustices, inconsiderations in a day? How many times do we injure another?
Lotta. Let's just say.
And so to be kind (let me get this straight) you've got to forgive all that crap?
YES. Forgiveness is not the same thing as condoning, FYI. If someone hurts us repeatedly, we can protect ourselves from being hurt. It's true. We do not have to work with/put up with/deal with ongoing hurt by continuing to put ourselves in harm's way. Boundaries are a good thing. We can forgive. And choose not to work with/spar with/contend with or be an accomplice in our own harm.
And so we can feel safe forgiving ALL injuries sustained, and be an example of kindness. Because forgiveness does not mean we make ourselves vulnerable. We simply make ourselves kind.